Future In The Past

You have a 3% chance of becoming the man of the century, in the future. Clearly this won’t happen to you if your a woman. On the other hand, if you’ve slept with 10 times your fair share of women and have a striking haircut paired with good facial hair, odds are in your favor. 3% chance

You have a 9% chance of training your dog to scuba dive, in the future. Your clever dog is known for reeling in tail for you on dry land (such as the park). When it comes to scoring with ladies in the drink, you don’t have such success… Once you’ve trained your dog into full fledged dive master, your aqua bird hunting skills will be unstoppable, 9%

You have a 31% chance of becoming the owner of a foam car, in the future. Wooden cars have become retro, metal cars are metal, girls don’t fit in your Daewoo… foam parties are more your speed. What better way to roll up to a future foam party than in your own foam car. 31% chance

You have a .0007% chance of living forever, in the future. No question about it your a healthy human. In the not too distant future it won’t even matter that your healthy, you’ll be livin’ the good life and survivin’ off machines. Go ahead, light that cigarette, lay the chick with venereal diseases from a-z, inject that heroin… you’ll live forever – .0007%

You have a 13% chance of watching Pay-Per-View on your watch, in the future. It was one thing making collect watch phone calls on your wrist watch, years past. Watching premium Pay-Per-View television while cruising for ladies on the Miami Beach shore line, in your kayak… Well, thats only done by folks on a yacht. 13%

You have a 17% chance of being seduced by Swamp Thing, in the future. A humanoid mass of vegetable is all it takes to make you dripping wet. Swamp Thing will take you down… and you’ll be into it. 17%, no questions about this

You have a 100% chance of giving it 100% or nothing, in the future. Your attempts at giving it 100% fail more often then not. But, this time your really going for it. 100% chance

You have a 5% chance of executives accepting your website proposal, in the future. Someday, people from all walks of life will flock to computer screens to experience the beauty of your erotic-quasi-religious-oriented-webcam-chat-room social networking website for teens. Until that day, you have slim chances the execs will dig your website proposal.

You have a 26% chance of contracting the water disease, in the future. Right now you might enjoy a hot soak in a steaming bath all while sharing intravenous needles with your co-bathers. Soon you won’t. After contracting the water disease by injecting hot bathwater into your system via shared needle you will be thinking twice about such water sports

You have an 88% chance of Encountering a Luck Dragon, in the future. Thanks to the success of the 1986 blockbuster “Flight of the Navigator” directed by phenom Randal Kleiser and starring child heartthrob Joey Cramer, your chances of encountering one of nature’s most majestic creatures, the fabled Luck Dragon, have soared. “Just a kid with data” becomes the navigator – and in doing so, captures the imagination of a generation. David Freeman; Falcor: you are adventure fantasy at it’s finest.