Future In The Past

You have an 8% chance of being arrested for child abuse, in the future. The United States vs. Abernathy vs. Ostrycharz Supreme Court case (also in the future), will make it illegal for parents to prohibit children of any age to own and operate portable communication devices, including cellular telephony devices, walkie-talkies, and webcam-enabled Fisher-Price netbooks. It will be very hard to get away with feeding your kids whatever you have on hand, and they might just call the cops on you. 8% chance.

You have a 1.6% chance of becoming the first human to get a disease formerly known to only affect the fruits of plants. Congratulations, you are the missing link, kinda. Chances for a successful therapy are unknown, but strapping biomedical devices to yourself in conspicuous places will increase your chances of scoring with drunk singles. Simply harboring the pathogen is a simple, 1.6% chance.